We know that there are many red flags for what not to look for in a partner, but what are the signs that someone is good for you? Our couples therapists share 3 relationship green flags – signs that you’re in a healthy relationship.
They take responsibility for their issues
By far the biggest green flag that couples therapists see in couple therapy, is when a partner is able to reflect on their own issues/history/past/part of the problem – and they address it. Self-reflection and the ability to take responsibility for your part – is absolutely critical for solving any relationship issue. A partner that is able to own their baggage and is working on it, is a partner that knows that they have a role to play in fixing the problems, and they aren’t afraid to do it.
They fight fair
A partner who respectfully listens to your differences and discusses differences in a fair and safe way, earns a big green tick from this couples therapist. Fighting is inevitable to all close relationships. We can’t get along all the time. It’s about how you fight that matters, and we recommend a partner who fights fair, doesn’t play tit-for-tat, doesn’t yell/shout/become abusive, and who genuinely wants to listen to your point of view. If you don’t fight fair, couples therapy can help.
They communicate regularly and openly
Couples that talk about their relationship – have better relationships. We know this based on the research, but also we know it feels so validating when you’re in a relationship with a person who opens up and in turn creates a safe space for you to open up. Good communicators not only talk, but they listen. Keep your eyes and ears out for a partner who shares their perspective kindly and calmly, and asks for yours. If you’re stuck in silence, couples therapy can support you and your partner to establish positive communication practices.
Green flags are critical signs that you’re on the right path to a healthy and stable relationship.